Monday, October 15, 2007

Isn't that supposed to cure us?

On Sunday evening, we attended an impromptu barbeque at my sister's and we had the pleasure of playing with an absolutely precious and adorable eight month old. And by "we," I really mean "I" and by "playing," I mean crawling around on the floor like a silly person oohing and ahhing over her. I have friends who tell me..."Oh just spend a few hours with a little one and then you'll be happy you get to go home to an empty house!" But let me tell you, I am not one of those girls. I fully understand the enormous amount of responsibility it is (well, as much as a non-mommy can understand). Having been a nanny for a few years to Emma and William (both under the age of 5) and spent several weekends by myself with the two of them (while mom and dad were out of the country), I am not one of those women who want a baby so I can play "dress up" (I have pups for that) or to have someone to love unconditionally (I have Mr. Howard for that) or need attention or company in my life (I have a phenomenal family for that). I am, instead, one of those women who was just born to be a mommy. I'm not saying that I'll be the most amazing mom in the whole world or that I'm not going to be scared when that day comes. What I'm saying is that I truly believe that I was put on this earth to be a mommy and that there is no more difficult and rewarding experience in the whole world. And until the day comes when I can experience it for myself, my job allows me to play mommy from 9am to 3:30pm - Lucky me!

All in all, I left happy that I got to ignore the world (and by world, I mean my husband, sister and Adeline's parents) to pretend she was mine, devastated that I haven't yet entered the world of mommy-hood, and excited that someday soon I will get to. And until that day, I will have to settle to being mommy to Harley and Jake.

((I wish I could say that Mr. Howard too had some epiphany about daddy-hood, but the truth is I didn't give him 2 seconds to play with her. I didn't mean to, but I kinda hogged her. Sorry, babe!))


LittleDreamer said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

You make me smile! I suppose it is supposed to cure you, but when it's the desire of your heart...a cure is not necessary. Interesting that you are wanting children and I am so grateful that I am not at that stage right now. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE children at all ages, but after working with them for years, I am enjoying the break. It is an immense responsibility, and I guess I am just looking forward to graduating and having a different kind of life for a while. Of course, it would help to find a man before venturing into the children market, but at least I know I'm content without them right now. :)

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