Sunday, April 3, 2011


So on Saturday God and I had a long chat (well...I chatted...) and I've decided that no good can come about from me dwelling on what could happen. I mean I could drop down dead at any moment or I could live to be 130. We really don't know what could happen. People who live in the what-if's and the could's and live their life in fear aren't really living. And I think I  have a choice in all of this. I can choose to stop living my life and worry. Or I can choose to trust and go about my life with the facts that I currently have.

Here are the facts as I know them: Isabella is beautiful and healthy and we can't wait to meet her. Aiden is growing perfectly (he and Isabella are the exact same size: 1.2 pounds); his amniotic fluid is perfect; and he's got the most adorable profile. Connor is rambunctious, loving, handsome, and explorative. I am in great health (minus the two babies growing and stretching my body like Stretch Armstrong). And Mr. Howard is perfectly healthy, attentive, a wonderful daddy, and a great friend to me.

So, we are having twins in July and that is all there is to it. If there's anything I've learned with Cole, it's that you can't predict what will happen. Life is short and there is no sense in trying to predict the path that has been chosen for you. All this means so far is that we're going to get to see our beautiful babies a little more often and Connor is going to get to have some extra testing, so that we can rest easy! We are going to buy two cribs; I'm going to buy the "Coming Home From the Hospital" outfits I've had my eye on; and I'm even going to have them embroidered with Aiden and Isabella on them; we are designing Connor's big boy room and finishing the twin's nursery; and we are going to continue to smile and laugh and love.

All this doesn't mean I'm not going to worry or that I'm going to stop praying, but I refuse to give in and allow the fear to become  my life. It isn't fair to Mr. Howard. It isn't fair to me. It isn't fair to Connor. And it especially isn't fair to Aiden and Isabella, who need my strength and positive thoughts.

(In the words of my dear friend Amy who ends every post with the following)
So there!


Amy Walton said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Awww! I love you! This sounds absolutely wonderful. <3 My thoughts are with you

Isn't that ending just so fitting sometimes?! ;)

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