Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Perfect

Although I don't want for it to have changed me and defined who I am, it has. But not for the reasons you might think. Losing a child has given me a perspective and a sense of urgency that has rocked my very foundation. I no longer look at life as a given. I no longer assume that the people I love the most are destined to be here forever.

And while it has given me some traits I'd rather not have (like the hardness I have towards other tragedies), it has also given me traits I wish I could have possessed beforehand.

I hug my kids more because of it.

I tell my children how much I love them because of it.
 I tell my husband how madly in love with him I am.

I smile in the midst of chaos and filth because it means that my kids are here to make it messy.
I don't get stressed when the babies are crying and I can't fix it, because crying means they're here with me.

I do the things today that I used to say I'd do tomorrow.

Looking at that picture above with my baby girl, husband, baby boy, little man, Harley, and Jake (and a monkey thrown in for good measure) makes me feel so blessed. My life may be chaotic and crazy and if you knock on my door when I'm home with the kids, you'll more than likely hear at least one baby crying, see dishes in my sink; a dog will most definitely be barking, and I may or may not have makeup on. And it's probably likely that you won't envy my life at all. But, for me, it's the perfect life.


2 comments:

My name is Heather. said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

most perfectly said, and terribly known. i wish i couldn't relate.

LittleDreamer said... Best Blogger Tips[Reply to comment]Best Blogger Templates

Way to go! The past three months have certainly altered my perspective and challenged me to live for today.

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